Friday, July 23, 2010

#79 Visit 5 DC Museums....

Remember how I insanely made a list at the Day Zero Project (the 101 things in 1001 days list)?

I finished my first one! #79!!!

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It was a semi-cheat because I knew I was going to Washington DC at the end of June, but I put "visit 5 DC museums I've never visited" to encourage me to try something new and exciting. Since the fiance would be trapped (um, is "trapped" the right word for "working in an air-conditioned convention center all day while girlfriend sweats her sweet ASS off"? hmm) for eight hours a day, I had many hours to fill. Believe it or not - well actually, if you've been to DC, you'll totally believe it - about 20 or so free hours was actually not enough time. I'm not worried about that though; because Jam was trapped at a conference, he didn't have the chance to see much of anything except the Washington Monument from a taxi and Union Station, poor guy, so we're already talking about going back there. Plus I shafted friends that live in DC due to the complete lack of free time in my weekend and due to the fact that by Sunday afternoon at 2pm, I was frickin spent. So spent that I spent an hour and a half at a random Starbucks reading a magazine and then another 45 minutes snoozing in the lobby of the Westin...even though we had checked out at 9am. Classy.

Anywho, the museum QUEST was successful! Here's a brief synopsis with pictures. Some of these places I've visited before, but I did fit in the five new!

Friday:

Booked it to the Museum of Natural History.

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I've been to the museum four or five times. I'm a bio nerd, I can't help it! Truly, it feels so familiar and home-y to me, it reminds me of college. Smith had this way waaaay scaled down version of geological displays, Tufts had elephants everywhere, the smell of taxidermy is strangely comforting. Yes, yes I know it is sick and deranged, but I skipped through the entrance and smiled when I saw the big old elephant in the rotunda:

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Next I wanted to see the Wittelsbach-Graff diamond, the only other blue diamond similar in size to the Hope Diamond. It is at the Smithsonian for in-depth analysis; scientists are trying to determine if it was mined from the same mine as the Hope or even cut from the same stone. Crazy.

Here's the Hope out of it's setting (for analytic purposes)

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And the Wittelsbach-Graff

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I think they must be from the same mine!

I looked at all the other gems as long as I could stand the crowds. It gets bad in there, and while I was visiting at about 6pm during the museum's summer extended hours, it did little to control the crowding in the gems (though it was great in the rest of the museum!!)

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Spanish Inquisition Necklace. Frickin' gorgeous!

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Hall Sapphire and Diamond Necklace - another fav, I love the color of these sapphires!

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This is a kunzite and freshwater pearl necklace. Isn't it pretty?

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Hall of Oceans. Pretty sure I hadn't seen this before....

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Mammals exhibit, which features a huge emphasis on sub-Saharan mammals....which is what I studied in Kenya ("The Grazing Habits of Sixteen Large Mammals and the Ostrich in Nairobi National Park") so naturally I kind of get off on this exhibit and the fantastic attention to detail, though I would expect nothing less from the Smithsonian. Note on the left how the leopard is featured in a tree with its kill? Fab.

While I was at the Natural History Museum, I also looked at various bones, skulls, learned about evolution and looked at a LOT of insects. Fun times. But patience and energy were wearing thin, and we had dinner plans with Jamaal's friends, so I called it a night and headed back to the hotel, snapping a few shots of Smithsonian Castle on the way out:

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Up next: the brutal, grueling, energy-sapping schedule that was Saturday.

Hair did, Nails did, etc

So Saturday is my 10-year high school reunion.
In the past week I've had a haircut, eyebrow wax and pedicure. Today I'm going in for a quick manicure.

My mother is wondering what's wrong with me. "What's all this about? Pride?" she asked last night. "HELLS YES" I answered "I haven't seen 99% of these people since graduation! I have to look halfway good and seem successful!!!"

She just raised her eyebrows, looking at me like I was crazy. But it's true, it's true! I do need to look halfway decent and seem somewhat successful in life!

Then I think, Oh hell, why do I even care? It's not like I'm friends with these people. I don't give a flying f*** what they think about me, and most of them I'll probably never see again. What is it that is driving me to do all this (not that a haircut or mani/pedi are exactly a chore lol)?

I think it might be my own personal secret revenge. It's not like I was bullied or beat up in high school or anything like that. I wouldn't want to have to do it over, but at the time, it wasn't like I led this miserable existence, I think I made the best of it and tried to have fun (and did have a lot of fun.....heh heh heh). I think I was definitely nerdy, but my friends and I played sports, were in the marching band (ok that's kinda dorky) were involved in a billion extracurricular activities, were in National Honor Society, etc. Despite this, a certain subset of people were just...I don't know...bitches..and sometimes, we were definitely singled out as victims (don't worry, most of them got what was coming to them before they even left high school. college rejection, what? yeah, that's me being a bitch hahahahah). My friend from high school and I have talked about this here and there, and while we absolutely laugh about it now, we sometimes look back kind of puzzled. What drove this bitchery? It seems we did very little to provoke it! Oh well. I don't mean to dwell on high school, 'cause it's over and we're OVER IT. But will I look for opportunities to point and laugh (even if it's post reunion, over a bottle, uh I mean glass, of wine with my friend?) Oh.Hells.Yes. Can't wait to see what karma has done to some of these people, and how the people who were fun and nice have come out on top. *evil smile*

Thursday, July 22, 2010

We Love Your Miss Hannigan!


My sister made me this screencap thinger (or whatever you call it) because she is a rockstar.
My parents recently upgraded and now our world includes Starz. I don't know how I'll react when Jam moves up here and we get HBO and I can see True Blood live. I'll probably freak. Anyway, Annie came on fancy cable the other night. God, I hadn't seen that movie in years, and could not stop commenting on the cuteness of little Annie singing in her windowsill, how little the orphans were and how they hadn't seemed that small (Amy pointed out that we watched this when we were kids, so that's why the kids seem small now lol)...then Miss Hannigan came on the screen. As soon as she started her drunken lurch towards the orphan's sleeping quarters, swinging lightbulbs and her bathtub gin bottle as she went, I said "If I could be a character in any movie, I think it might be Miss Hannigan." Sure, who wouldn't want to play something more romantic and tragic, like Karen Blixen in Out of Africa or Katharine Clifton in The English Patient, but honestly, I think my personality would work better playing Miss Hannigan.


"Do I hear........singing???"
"Do I hear........happiness???!"

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Why I Want to Move to the Island



So I get home from my very relaxing vacation and decide to check my work email.

Mistake n0 1

This tw*t in Cali, a woman I have never met yet know never to rely upon because she does not respond to emails in a timely manner (when she does they are always "sent from my iPhone" where is she, at the beach?) and generally does not know what the F*CK is going on, sends me this email going up one side of me and down the other about how I didn't "cc" her on an issue. She thought it was a new issue, assigned it to a programmer when the lead programmer was working on it. She was all pissed. Oh I don't know why, maybe because she looked as f*cking stupid as she actually is? Hmmm.

I actually started to type this explanation about how the CRA had been instructed by me to not continuously contact the programmers about the same problem, how I was really sorry about how he harassed her etc. Then I thought, HELL TO THE NO, this chick totally ruined my happy vacation karma, I am not going to apologize. Instead I replied "No Prob. Thx" Unprofessional? Yes. I hope it goes right up her ass. I feel a "L***a is a stupid ass" conversation between me and the office mate tomorrow. Eh.

MAN. You can tell I have had nothing to be evilly miserable about for DAYS. I have been living in a happy world of sun, boats, swimming, bathing suits, small birds hopping around and chirping, baby ducks, etc. I mean, maybe I was evil misery for about a half hour on Friday when I fantasized about buying a bb gun so I could shoot our obese neighbor who insisted on playing HORRIBLE music at full blast. Dude does not understand how sound carries on the open water, the fact that we hate hate HATE his shitty music, that his free-roaming dogs are a f*cking nuisance (and I generally love dogs) and that his existence on the island pisses me off. Ha ha ha evil misery. My sister told me that I sounded just like my father when talking about the bb gun fantasies, but I said that I was nicer because he fantasizes about shooting defenseless neighborhood animals, I fantasize about shooting (non-lethal shooting) annoying neighbors. I suppose this would nonetheless be considered assault, so this fantasy will live tucked away in my head until I find someone with a high-powered speedboat that could quickly whisk me away from the scene of the crime. Hmmm...anyone out there own a speedboat??

Seriously though, I had a lovely weekend and kind of did not think about work or the wedding for four consecutive days. Splendid! I read two whole books and some of another, knit, and played some cards. Good stuff. Except for one day, the weather was really nice and I spent a good number of hours in a lounge chair (with spf 70 all over my pale ass), and may have passed out for a while, ha ha ha. The sunsets were particularly lovely:






And there were rainbows, too:

Alas, vacay is over.
Tomorrow it's back to reality: work, lymphoma (endless lymphoma), apartment hunting, wedding CRAP (though I sense a shower in the forecast...maybe?) and lists and lists of sh*t to do.

For now, I'm going to watch pointless TV and edit my pics and throw them on facebook, and pretend Monday isn't happening.

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!

Tuesday, July 06, 2010

New Background


How's this EE???
A little less emo and angsty?
LOL

I admit to struggling with the blog layout. I can't find anything I like. This is better than the emo rain though.

I have things I need to post about but I am behind. At work, at life, at everything - I am behind.
Disaster.

I am also bailing for the weekend on Thursday. I can't tell you how irresponsible this is with the literal mountain of work sitting on my desk, the dozens of emails needing answers, the calls I'm supposed to be scheduling....yup. I'm bailing with my bffl (my sister) for NH - a small island in the middle of the lake, to be exact. This location lacks: internets, cars, stores, too many people, drama (most of the time....). What it has in abundance:

Sunsets

Sunrises

Wildlife


Bald Eagle

Common Loons

Mink


Mergansers

Dramatic Scenery


Fun and Games



Peace and Quiet

I'm not being dramatic when I say I'm counting down the hours til we pull into the marina parking lot and we're free to play for the whole weekend. Yay!

Monday, June 21, 2010

A Way to HELP!

After months of anger and frustration about the situation in the Gulf, I have finally found a great way to help out with oil spill relief that is not necessarily expensive. I'm sure that donations to organizations such as the National Audubon Society and Ducks Unlimitied (and a whole host of others working to relieve the situation - click here for the Better Business Bureau's list) are more than welcome and absolutely necessary - but if you're not able to come up with a chunk of change any time soon (I feel your pain!) here's another great way to help!

In my quest to clean up my wedding-related firefox bookmarks, I've been clicking on things I've bookmarked to see whether or not I need to keep them. One craft blog lead to another and then lead to another....and I stumbled across Craft Hope. They've teamed up with The Institute for Marine Mammal Studies, Audubon Nature Institute, and the Mississippi Sandhill Crane National Wildlife Refuge and have started an effort to collect rags and towels for cleaning oiled animals: birds, turtles, dolphins, you name it. The post specifies size and materials, and lists the address where this stuff needs to be sent. It's a great opportunity to gather up your old sheets or go through your t-shirt bin and have a little fun with some fabric scissors :) If you're so inclined, you could even throw in a bottle or two of Dawn (why Dawn? Read this)

See? Totally easy! And cheap! And you can stop feeling totally and utterly helpless and useless (how I've been feeling)!

There is a "deadline" for this project - July 3rd - I think it's mostly so the woman delivering supplies doesn't get completely overwhelmed, though she said she'd accept donations beyond the "deadline" of course...but the "deadline" for me is just another reason to go through my old stuff to try and help out, especially since I'll be moving in a couple of months and would've had to do this anyway. I can't believe I'm suddenly looking forward to sorting out that old t-shirt bin!

Friday, June 18, 2010

Still Awake






After this week of work madness I needed some peace and quiet.
My coworker and office mate, whom I actually like a lot, was full of complaints and noise today.
I was at the end of my rope. I left early. I walked through a mob of my coworkers way way early and said "have a nice weekend!" and did NOT look back nor CARE.

I finished my book.
I snoozed on the train.
I sang show tunes all the way home.
Then I took myself to the river.
It was all bluegreenshimmery and it smelled like summer and water.
The air was full of birds and dragonflies.
It was glorious glorious and quiet and still and comforting and peaceful.
And perfect.



Strangely after all this
I'm still awake.
I'm supposed to be working on a wedding "to do" document.
Instead I'm rewatching the series finale of Lost....
And listening to some Great-Horned Owls call to each other.
It's quiet and peaceful too.
Just what I needed.

Dream Last Night

Last night I dreamed it was Sunday morning.

My father went out the side door to get the Boston Globe off the side walkway.

He bent over and looked at the front page and said 'I forgot we lost a guy this week.'

I dreamed a state trooper had died.

This morning I woke up, and that's just what happened. It has me quite spooked.

This story is sad beyond sad. My heart goes out to the family. Four kids? Tragic. I have so much empathy for the situation. I understand the motive for working late at night, extra details, the danger of working out on the road. Lucky for me, I have never had to experience a loss such as this.

This easily could've been our family. How many nights did my father stand outside on the highways, directing traffic, working details to put me and my sister through college? Hundreds. Probably even thousands. He even got hit by a car at least twice. Thank the powers above he retired.

I have no more words. So I'm stopping.

Thursday, June 03, 2010

101 Things in 1,001 Days

**Yes it took me 12 days to finish this post. Blogger hates my computer at work and at home and keeps crashing. Enormous frustration. I also changed the blog background. I've wanted to do this forever, but am now completely unsure of my choice. I will probably make many changes before settling on something for good.....**

I have a HUGE HUGE HUGE HUUUUUUUUGE project due at work.

That's not the problem. The problem is I AM A PROCRASTINATOR. Have been since college. It's kind of bad...ok, not kind of bad, it's really bad. I am supposed to have a pile of work done by tomorrow, and instead of getting it done now, during my normal 8:20-4:20, I'm sitting here blogging, knowing full well I'll probably be catching the 6:15 or 7:30 train home due to my procrastinating propensities.

Why would I do this? My best work is done under pressure. Yeah, I know professors tell you in college "don't wait until the last minute to do this paper! It's 90 pages, and I'll know if you did it the night before." Not to brag (and I'm not going to call it bragging because I didn't even make the dean's list til senior year) but I NEVER received less than a B on a paper, and actually, I can count the number of "B" papers on a single hand (not that you would know from reading this blog, since I write in broken English , on the fly, do not edit, and probably commit any number of egregious spelling and grammatical mistakes. At least I edited in college!) Tests, well tests are a whole other story, lol, I bombed most of my college exams because I suck at tests HARD, which is why I took four writing-based classes senior year...but I digress...the point is, I produce my best work under pressure and know that my project will be better if I wait and do it tonight. In the meantime, I'm a-blogging.

So I am ready to share my list of 101 things I want to accomplish in 1,001 days. Of course some things won't happen. I know that. But I am a list maker. And part of me will love failing to do all the things on this list, because then I'll be able to make a new to-do list with all my unfinished things. The cycle continues...and I like to be 1o5, expiring only after I complete my list. Makes perfect sense, does it not?! (ps I just fixed my , key and feel like a goddang genius. Had to share that tidbit)

Anyways, here goes my boring ass list with brief explanations. Note that I did not take the easy route out by writing things such as "get married." Just note.

1. Get an article published in a magazine
Kind of a copout since I am planning on being published in an academic journal soon. Still though.
2. Read the Bible (Old and New Testaments)
I've only read a few things. And since I have strong opinions about the Bible and religion, I should probably do the background reading, right?
3. Visit a new continent
4. Go back to Africa
Pretty please?! It's my heart and soul.
5. Buy a house
Would be nice
6. Plant a lilac
7. Walk the whole Freedom Trail
What kind of Bostonian am I having never done that?!
8. Visit 10 new states
9. Go to five new national parks
10. Buy a hybrid car
11. See 30 new birds
neeerrrrrd alert
12. Kayak in a new place
13. Make myself a sweater
14. Run the Boston Marathon
unless my shin acts up again :(
15. Skydive
Second scariest thing on this list
16. Memorize three poems
17. Get out of debt
uh, credit card debt...unless I hit the lottery the student debt is here to stay for a while
18. See a Red Sox game
19. Skip work for fun
20. Help an animal
21. Take a cooking class
22. Try and learn a new language
Wow, it was a real moment of weakness when I put that up there
23. Learn basic home repair
24. Take a dance class with Jamaal
25. Read 20 books from Modern Library's List of 100 Best Books of the 20th Century
26. Go to a drive-in movie
27. Learn more about my ancestors
28. Write a letter to a teacher who changed my life
29. Help someone do something they thought they couldn't
30. Make a pie with fruit I've grown myself
31. Visit the Mapparium
32. Go to the top of a lighthouse
33. Sponsor a child
34. Knit 50 hats for Caps for Kids
35. Have a spa day
36. Finish a coloring book with a new pack of crayons
37. Read all the unread books currently on my shelf
38. Climb a mountain (or a large hill)
because I hate hiking
39. Make a custom recipe book
40. Make a list of 100 things that make me happy/grateful
because I am a complaining b*tch sometimes
41. Go to the Heifer farm to deliver baby lambs
42. Turn off the TV for a week
43. Photo document a year of married life
44. Document a week
45. Catch up on my scrapbooking
46. Finally make the gay quilt for EE
47. Finish my senior year calligraphy project
48. Work on a Habitat for Humanity house
49. See 10 classic movies I've never seen
50. Go to a Broadway show
51. Go to a book signing and tell the author why I liked his/her book
52. Take a snowboarding lesson
53. Learn how to play tennis
54. Buy a pair of killer heels
55. Participate in a sprint triathlon
56. Make a marriage sampler
57. Take yoga
58. Go to afternoon tea with a friend
59. Enlarge one of my photos into a canvas artpiece
60. Help someone anonymously
61. Shoot a gun (at a shooting range)
62. Visit Niagra Falls
63. Learn (properly) how to change a flat tire
64. Do 100 pushups
65. Put dead batteries in all my watches
66. Learn all the countries in the world and their capitals
67. Get caught up at work
68. Make a meal with only local food
69. Participate in a flash mob
70. Finish my bird life list
71. Go iceskating
72. Fly a kite
73. Buy a lottery ticket
74. Take a trip with my sister
75. Host a fabulous dinner party and invite friends
76. Dedicate one wall in my house as a "travel wall" filled with memories
77. Answer the "50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind"
78. Scan my unscanned photos; save on external HD, put in my parent's fireproof safe
79. Visit 5 DC Museums I've never visited
80. Watch 10 documentaries
81. Learn to juggle
82. Visit the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum
83. Visit Western Mass with Jamaal
84. Complete a possessions purge
85. Go out to eat in a fancy Boston restaurant
86. Get a good pair of jeans that are flattering and fit
87. Have a nice surprise waiting for Jamaal when he comes home from a traveling stint
88. Go camping
89. Ride a rollercoaster (it's been YEARS)
90. Recycle WAY more
91. Spend a day at the beach
92. Learn about wine
93. Reduce my yarn stash to nearly 0
94. Buy a bottle of Perrier Jouet to celebrate the completion of this list
95. Have my sister teach me how to use photoshop
96. Learn and identify 5 constellations
97. Give up soda for a month
98. Try 10 new crafts in Martha Stewart's Encyclopedia of Crafts
99. Meet with a rep at work to review my 401k and 403b's
100. Have a baby
the FIRST most scariest thing on this list. Don't know if I'll be ready. Or that it will happen. Um, but wouldn't it be insane if by Feb 2013 I had a kiddo? CRAZY.
101. Write about doing this challenge.

So there it is. Some of the things WILL get done. Some won't. I'm interested to see what I accomplish. OK Back to work...




Wednesday, June 02, 2010

If you are bored, or trying to INTENSELY procrastinate>>>

Head on over to testcolor.com for an online color personality test. It's fun, it eats up a small portion of the day...

Your Profile :

The Weekend

The weekend was quite lovely.

It was relaxing - I shopped, went to the gym, lazed about watching my hulu queue, and worked on wedding decorations.

I have pictures I'll put up later...

In other news, I was cleaning up my favorite links over there on the right side of the page and "re-discovered" a bunch of blogs I thought were dormant. Putting them on my google reader was practically akin to Christmas morning, all those juicy new posts to go through. Hurrah!

I have many to add back to that list. I subscribe to 111 blogs via google reader though, so I'm not sure that there's enough room on my little blog scroll. We'll see.

Also, I am still mad about the oil spill.
So mad. Anyone have book recommendations on cutting oil dependency/living green, etc? I'll take anything worthwhile, not just oil-cutting tips, though those would be preferable!

That is all, back to the drudgery of the work day (sorry this was so boring).

Thursday, May 27, 2010

VENT

OMG

SO get this - my eye doctor's schedule is booked 3-4 months in advance...so if you want an appointment in June, you best call by February or you're out of luck. I know this. I called in February. I got an appointment for June 10th.....

....which turned out to be the date of the most important conference call of the year. It took me weeks to get the appointment, then for various reasons it took me two weeks to get someone on the phone to cancel it. I was squeezed in to a Tuesday morning space in August....very inconvenient, at least half a personal day from work, etc.

This morning my boss comes in, all laissez-faire and SHIT and is like "oh yeah, well....the programmers don't have anything ready. So we're canceling that call and all related calls and scheduling them for a week later. Update your schedule, mmmmkay?"
WTF
WTF
WTF
And she WONDERS why nothing is EVER accomplished?! It's because of this absolute BULLSH*T. Sooooo **irritated**

And I know this is a 24/7 deal for a lot of people, they get jerked around every damn day, so I should be grateful that it only happens to me once in a while. Still though. I swear, if it were any other doctor or dentist, I wouldn't even care, but this just pissed me off no end. Oh, and the fact that I can't see with my glasses anymore is also a concern.

I know my August appt coincides with a conference call, and usually I bend over backwards to be accommodating and call in from the road or from the effing train to join in the conversation, but this time, I'm going to be BUSY. Hmmm. Maybe I should make plans to go to the beach that day with my sister. Hmmm....I have found the silver lining!

Ah, blog venting does serve a purpose.

Monday, May 24, 2010

No Title

Oh there are so many things I could blog about this morning...

A weekend of productivity, Jam's first week traveling, missing the last Braintree train and not freaking out about it, the incredible Lost finale, or even frickin' Grey's Anatomy, how my parents went away and for the first time no one died while they were on vacation.....so much...

But last night I barfed up my lovingly homemade chili and cornbread with vomiting my sister described as "champion" and my mother described as "horrifying" - then this morning, while lying in bed trying to figure out if the remnants are going to make an exit, my father announced that during the washer/dryer installation in the basement, the plumber found a crack in the foundation and the town was coming out to shut off our water....for.two.days.

So yeah, not in the mood to blog, especially when I'm worried about being able to shower and flush the toilet. Eh. Back to my excessive Hulu queue.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Feminism and Irreverence

I have posed this question before, but SERIOUSLY

Why is FEMINISM such a dirty word to some women?

Ugh. I am so tired of hearing women get all angsty and defensive, holding up their hands saying "I'm not a feminist!" or "I don't consider myself a feminist!" blah blah blah. Let me make this as simple as possible: Is it your dream to be submissive to men for the rest of your life? Yes? Ok, then you're probably not a feminist. Everyone else probably should identify as one. I'm not telling you to do anything radical, I'm just telling you to stick up for yourself, and to not let ANYONE convince you that you are inferior or unworthy because of your gender.

What spurned this? Comments on a wedding blog. Ugh. They get hecka ugly, but this is one of the reasons why women should not be afraid to identify as a feminist and fight back a little bit. All this because this poor bride decided to "break with tradition." Oh GAWD forbid. (And just to clarify, this feminist will be walked down the aisle by her dad, then married by a female minister - which one of my friends said was "just wrong - women shouldn't be ministers." Think I need to have the feminist talk with her?)

Now the irreverence.
So Jam and I are a biracial couple, he's black, I'm white. There it is, PC terminology aside (though you can call my caucasian, if you must lol). We joke about race A LOT. Lately I've wondered if it's too much? At what point do you cross the line and make people uncomfortable? Or should we joke about because it does make people uncomfortable and it's a good way to get these conversations out on the table? Eh. I dunno. We've been joking a lot about potential future children. Let me tell you, it gets old pretty fast when you have people who are practically strangers telling you that your children would be beautiful because they will be "mixed" or my FAV "mulatto." I'm like "wait, mulatto....um do we still use that word or did it kind of go out of style with the END OF SEGREGATION?" I could be wrong, hell, "negro" showed up on the census (still confused about THAT) so maybe mulatto is all good for all I know. But yeah, people tell us we'll have cute kids. Um ok, why would you say that. Maybe they just don't know what else to say? I mean I think Jam and I are decent looking people, you know, average, and hopefully we'd have decent looking kids, but you never know when those genes could combine and make something a little freaky, because we've ALL seen kids of all shapes, sizes and colors who come out looking fetal or like little old men. It happens. I don't think our mixed race-ed-ness will help that.

I do joke about "hybrid vigor" though, being the science nerd that I am. For those of you not as embarrassingly nerdy as I hybrid vigor is basically defined as:

Hybrid Vigor or Heterosis
: An increase in the performance of hybrids over that of purebreds

I was explaining this to a girl at the platelet clinic. I said that while maybe our kids wouldn't necessarily be "beautiful" they would have certain qualities that might give them the most infinitesimal genetic edge over their peers (this is a joke, ok, before anyone really science-y tells me this is impossible). When she asked what hybrid vigor was, I told her, and she still looked puzzled, and I said "you know, it's why all those little mutt dogs live FORever without any health problems while sometimes you get a purebred puppy with two heads or five limbs!!" She looked at me horrified. "You are comparing your future children to mixed-breed dogs?" she exclaimed. Yikes. When she put it that way, it sounded pretty bad. I told Jam and he gave his usual response "Oh. My. Goodness." followed by laughter. But did I cross the line? Should I not say these things. Granted if someone said this to me, I might punch them in the nose - but do I get to say it because I'm living it? Hmmm. I think because I'm me, and I love to get laughs out of people, and at times, shock them, I'll stick with it. There are lines I won't cross, and I think it's good that they're in place (won't say the n-word, don't really joke about slavery,etc) and I can stick with my brand of comedy right now - cause at the end of the day you kind of just have to laugh at the situation, and some people are far too serious...

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Coworker Funnies.

I work with some really sweet people. Yes, finally, after years of suffering with the old assortment of wretched coworkers - it's some days, nothing short of miraculous to me how we've done a 180 over here.

Before moving, I worked with the one and only guy I've ever shared an office with here at the cancer hospital. Yeah, he's the one who said "goodnight girls" every night to me and my coworker and it went up my all-women's-college-educated ASS every time, but at the end of the day, I think is a nice person and would probably do anything for any of us, even though he has come across a little bit sexist, lol. He's a sucker for the damsel-in-distress act and is more than willing to move heavy equipment or set up computers for us females, or do other manly things such as fixing the printer (not that I can't do it, I am simply lazy). He even offered to show me the medical software he is piloting when I was bitching about our electronic medical records system and its general suckitude. Very sweet.

Yesterday I saw him in the kitchen - you would think this would not be a big deal, but since my move diagonally across the second floor, I rarely see him. "Hey stranger!" he shouted. Casual conversation ensued, in which he explained to me his penchant for stealing food and beverages from recently abandoned conference rooms. "I got a whole drawer of soda in the office!" he proclaimed excitedly. Seeing my opportunity, I mentioned donating platelets. "If you like free stuff, you should totally give it a try. There's the food, then there's all the other stuff I've ever received, shirts, towels, bags, cafeteria gift cards, free ice cream cards, raffle tickets for Red Sox tickets, etc, it's great, plus you get free parking, which is unheard of around here." I thought this would be an easy sell. He leaned in close to me "well I really would....but....." he leans back, as if to flex his muscles, "I hit the gym every morning six days a week. I'd have to skip a morning if I donated platelets...and uh....*sigh* *flex* I just can't give that up. It's a sacrifice I'm not willing to make."

uh. ok.

I said "Oh you're big and manly, surely you'd bounce right back." *pause for dramatic effect* "besides, I donate every other week and head home and go for a run." He did not seem convinced, no doubt due to the inferiority of "girl running" as opposed to "boy running." ha. At least I have this one consolation - should he ever donate, my platelet count probably kicks his platelet count's ass, since today mine was 436 (K), which I might add, was more than the sum of the counts two women donating next to me. Hoooolay hoooooo.

Also - did I mention the platelet donating disaster? I think not. Don't worry, it was nothing like this mofo, the granddaddy of all platelet-donating-related injuries:



Briefly, a few weeks ago I went to donate and got a guy who routinely seems nervous around me. I don't know if it's me, if he's just a nervous guy, or what, but as we went to stick the needle in my vein, I notice he's shaking. "WTF" is all I can think, but I try to stay calm around him, so he in turn calms down. He sticks the needle in and blood flies everywhere - on me, on the chair, on my blanket (miraculously not on my clothes), on the blood pressure cuff, on his glasses. Gah, it was nightmarish. Then the vein collapsed and my blood clotted in the pheresis machine. There was a lot of pulling the needle out and pushing it back in, lots of jiggling, before the guy's supervisor was like "Stop and switch arms!" Of course that didn't work because he proceeded to eff up the other arm. I actually felt bad for the poor guy, but my coworker Laura was like 'uh no, he should be fired!!' I figured it was a fluke.

Today I watched him stab someone else, as I was privileged to have the guy who is the BEST needle-sticker-inner ever. She yelped at one point. Luckily her head was turned away, so I didn't see what she did, which was blood pooling around her access site and dribbling down her arm, collecting between her forearm and the armrest. Ick. I was also glad to be a fast donate-r because I bounced out of there before she was finished and had a chance to survey the mess.

Speaking of mess, I got blood on my pants, because my finger stick bled like....I dunno, like I don't have a 436 platelet count, that's for damn sure:




But my pressure bandage matches my nail polish. Delight in the small things, folks:

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

101 Things in 1001 Days

Because I thrive on failure....

You all know I'm addicted to lists.
To me the "Day Zero Project" is the ultimate challenge. Ok maybe the "penultimate" (get it, ha ha ha ha) challenge, with the ultimate being an official bucket list, but Day Zero is definitely up there in terms of badass-ness.

Basically, you have 1,001 days to complete 101 things. The idea of this simultaneously thrills me and scares the sh*t out of me. Am I even creative enough to come up with 101 Things to do?

I'm working on it. And the list is coming...for anyone who even CARES ha ha ha

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

Mean Girls

I go to a small, local gym. I tend to see the same people every morning, and while most of them are pretty buddy buddy, I keep to myself. I go in, throw on my sneakers, hit whatever machine I feel like hitting that day (though as time goes on the more I'm going on the bike, definitely my weakest area if I'm going to pull off this sprint tri thing). Then I shower and get ready for work. Usually this involves putting on whatever clothes I've hauled to the gym with me, throwing product in my wet hair, slapping on some makeup and jetting to the commuter rail.

Today I made plans to go out after work, plus I had a meeting and was potentially seeing an old coworker. I kind of wanted to look nicer than usual. I brought a casual dress to wear, and decided that I'd use the gym's hairdryer to dry my hair for a change. I also packed my straightening iron knowing that I can't blow out my hair nicely to save my soul.

This morning after my workout I waited for the "primping lady" to move out of the way. She dries her sweaty hair with a hair dryer and then puts in up in curlers while she does her makeup. This doesn't bother me - I mean it's kinda creepy that she dries out her sweaty hair, but as Jam pointed out, she probably doesn't work up a serious sweat like I do, which is valid. Her primping doesn't bother me either - personally I feel slightly awkward doing my makeup in front of the mirror with a locker room full of people, but I try to be fast and not too vain about it, lol. What bothers me about primping lady is that she sprays about half a can of Aqua Net on her curlers before she takes them out and leaves, leaving the lingering sent of CFC's in the air (j/k CFC's aren't in hairspray anymore, but I'm going for drama here). When I went over to the vacant counter to start my own beauty regimen, I hacked up a lung full of Extra Hold, and fanned the air to try and dissipate the smell.

We-eeell this must've pissed off primping lady and her cronies, because when I flipped back up from drying my hair (I dry upside down when I'm going for speed/convenience) I caught them in the mirror, silent and staring at me. Then it was as though it clicked inside their empty heads that the dryer was off and they all went about their business. Yikes! What'd she say? Did she mock the shortness of my dress, accuse me of getting hair on the counter, or delight in my unsightly and pale legs? Is it me being paranoid? I definitely didn't imagine this. Did I break some sort of gym protocol and were the others shocked at my oblivious breach of etiquette? WTF?

It definitely reminded me of the scene from Mean Girls, the one where Cady walks into the gym after the Burn Book has caused a riot amongst the junior girls and says this:

"Have you ever walked up to people and realized they were just talking about? Have you ever had happen 60 times in a row, I have"

Obviously it wasn't 60 people, it was about 6, but it was that same icky feeling, that same "ok....what did I do....and why are you talking about it." I think I would've felt better if I had something stuck to my butt or something.

Though honestly in the grand scheme of life, what the hell do I care? Talk away b*tches, talk away. I'll only be going to that gym for another three months anyways, and after that it's not like I'll see these people again. HELL I don't see them outside the gym now, why am I worried? I guess it's just that I'd never really felt that icky feeling before. Thanks middle-aged women for finally giving me that experience.

Monday, May 03, 2010

Wedding Vent

OK I just need to do a little wedding guest vent here - b/c the wedding guests who see this will probably laugh, and the ones pissing me off probably read the wedding blog, but not this.

OMG.

This morning I receive an email "Your wedding website looks great, but you should have directions and a forum for guests so we can find rides."

OK so my sister, because she's SMART, embedded directions in the website subheadings "Ceremony" and "Reception" - clearly this person has NOT read the whole website, or she would have seen the stupid freakin' directions. UGH. Next, it is not possible to have a forum on the website. OK I'll give her that. I checked with Jamaal and we both decided that a facebook page might actually be pretty handy. I made sure the facebook group was "secret" and non-searchable. I explained to guests that it's a good place to chat and talk about details such as carpooling or rides to/from the airport. I even posted a few things in the discussion section. I figured that we could have people share wedding photos there too, when the deed is done, lol.

People started accepting the invites I sent out right away. What fun! I was sooo excited.
Then someone, the husband of one of Jam's friends, someone I actually think is great and funny and cool says "what time does the wedding start."

Wait. Seriously?
I mean, maybe I am totally overreacting, but you use this lame facebook group to ask me what time the wedding starts? Yeah, that's why people MAIL you a PAPER invitation with STUFF printed on it, stuff like, I dunno, the stupid day and time?! ARghghghgh.

I tell him to look on the real wedding website. Because at the very least, if you can't wait for the paper invite, frickin' look on the official site we've established to bring critical information to our guests, not some bullsh*t facebook group with 10 people in it.

Gah.
Rant over.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Oil Spill Disaster

When I watch the news and see the massive oil slick in the Gulf, it honestly makes me nauseous. I'm not even kidding, the mixture of dread, sadness and knowing all combine to make me a little bit queasy.

There are so many thoughts running through my head about this disaster. Didn't anyone have a plan in place for this sort of thing? It certainly doesn't seem like it. And in retrospect, when I hear the details of how far down the platform had drilled to get oil, I think "what the f*ck business did we think we had doing this?" I mean COME ON, we are a nation of smartass people, why have we sat back and not found a solution, an alternative, to offshore drilling? I work in a place that's curing cancer, for eff's sake, we are smart enough to come up with a new plan...why haven't we?

Oh wait. Probably because of all the people like the rich people with vacation homes in scenic vistas which also happen to be the perfect spot for a wind farm. Right. The same people who want to build their megamansions on eroding beach, mow down forests for their vacation cabin, shoot wolves from helicopters, and crush piping plovers under the tires of their gas-guzzling SUV's. But I digress...

I guess the reason I'm so cynical about this oil spill is because I've been there before. In 2003 I worked for a summer helping out with this environmental disaster. Let me tell you, compared to poor Louisiana, we were damn lucky. The Buzzards Bay oil spill took only 500 birds, which was a travesty at the time, but for NOLA and the gulf, 500 birds is gonna be the tip of the iceberg. The USCG, despite their best efforts, will absolutely NOT be able to contain the spill - I mean, we kind of already know that. Let me tell you what's going to happen (in my opinion/estimate): it's going to spread, it's going to wash up on the beach, and it's going to start coating and killing things. What it doesn't get on the shore, the slick will get as it slowly starts sinking to the bottom of the ocean, drifting through one layer of sea at a time, one ecosystem at a time, until in reaches the bottom and sits, smothering clams, shellfish, crabs, any other benthic creatures you have living down there. The birds are going to be absolutely covered with oil, and while some rescuers may be able to catch and clean them, for many it will be too late; birds instinctually preen their feathers, and whether or not they're fouled with oil is no exception. Feather preening will lead to oil ingestion, and this will lead to death. There will be carcasses washing onshore for weeks. Even after the oil is visibly gone, dead crap will be washing up for months.

My hope is that the cleanup is at least somewhat successful. The fact that Buzzards Bay and Barney's Joy made the recovery that they did is, in my inexpert opinion, nothing short of a miracle. I send good cleanup/recovery karma down to the Gulf, because they surely need it. It will be interesting to see how Obama's plans for offshore drilling change in the wake of this tragedy (hopefully they will). It will also be interesting to see how (or if) opinions change towards alternative forms of energy in the coming months. I am seriously keeping my fingers crossed. It's almost humorous to compare the environmental impact of a wind farm to the environmental impact of a massive oil spill. It's like comparing apples and a nuclear warhead. Let's get it together, people.

For me? I think it's time to think about moving closer to work where I can depend on public transportation and researching hybrid vehicles. Yeah, I dream of a brand new Subaru, but enough is enough, it's definitely time to break up with oil...a little bit at a time...

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Weird Formatting, The Knot Ticker

Ah, my blog is looking strange!
I added a new wedding ticker here....I love theknot.com one but their site is undergoing maintenance and I didn't want a huge obnoxious knot.com advertisement hanging out at the top of the blog. The new one is a little more subdued, but maybe a bit more refined? ha ha ha who knows.

I am off to donate platelets. Last time it didn't work out so well, my blood splurted right out from my vein all over my arm, the tech, and the blood pressure cuff. Hopefully this time I will have more success...

Picking Up Where I Left Off a Year Later

I began working on this list nearly a year ago. I found it out there in internet land and it's kind of fun. I think it'll help me come up with those 100 things in 1001 days list I was talking about yesterday...

Found this on someone's blog. The instructions are simple: just copy the list of 100 accomplishments, highlight the ones you've achieved in bold, and elaborate as desired.

It's big. But it's fun.

001. Started my own blog. Yep. I had three, two Africa-themed, and this one. The others have fallen by the wayside.

002. Slept under the stars. I dozed under them...out in the Mara...but not full-on sleep

003. Played in a band. HS marching band count?

004. Visited Hawaii.

005. Watched a meteor shower. Ok this is an "I think so" Every summer I lie out on our dock over the lake in NH and watch the stars fall. I guess it counts!

006. Given more than I can afford to charity. It's a vice. Not a bad one. But the whole "living beyond your means" bit comes up lol.

007. Been to DisneyWorld/Land. 1992. Oh the good times.

008. Climbed a mountain. (Kilimanjaro calls me sometimes.)

009. Held a praying mantis. Holbrook....never in Hanover.

010. Sung a solo. Kindergarten graduation "L for the lovelight in your eyes." Never again since.

011. Bungee jumped. You must be kidding. NO NO NO.

012. Visited Paris.

013. Watched lightning at sea. I can't quite remember, but surely on one of our mainland/Nantucket journeys. We were in a hurricane once....

014. Taught myself an art from scratch. A lot has been self taught with people weighing in.

015. Adopted a child. (Maybe someday)

016. Had food poisoning. Oh hells yes. J.F.K. School lunch: fish. Ugh. Kenya, the V-D (vomiting-diarrhea) One way to find out who your true friends are is to have terrible food poisoning around them - if one holds your hands while you go on the toilet and throw in the sink, and the other doesn't hate you forever for hogging the bathroom while she throws up in a trash barrel with HOLES in it, then there you have it, true friendship 4EVA.

017. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty. (No. Next time we go!)

018. Grown my own vegetables. Tomatoes only, but one day much more.

019. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.

020. Slept on an overnight train. I don't think a 3AM departure from Penn counts...

021. Had a pillow fight. Absolutely.

022. Hitchhiked (not sure I ever will.)

023. Taken a sick day when you're not ill. um. obviously. But not a lot! Maybe 3 times total!

024. Built a snow fort. Hells yes! Only reason to live in such a wintry clime!

025. Held a lamb. As it came out of its mom. It sounds gross, but it was freakin' amazing and I hope someday I'll get to do it again here: http://www.heifer.org/site/c.edJRKQNiFiG/b.201575/ (who will do this with me??)

026. Gone skinny dipping. Beginning of every semester at Smith, in the pond (ew!) and at home of course...that infamous night. heh.


027. Run a marathon. (a half. hope to change that soon)

028. Ridden in a gondola in Venice.

029. Seen a total eclipse. It was a lunar eclipse. Solar: only partial.

030. Watched a sunrise or a sunset. I love watching the sunrise. Love love it.
Seaplane over the Mountains

Small Ripples


031. Hit a home run. (can't remember!!)

032. Been on a cruise. Alaska. It was glorious.

033. Seen Niagara Falls in person.

034. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors. (not unless we're talking about the cradle of life, the Great Rift Valley!)

035. Seen an Amish community.

036. Taught myself a new language.

037. Had enough money to be satisfied. Here and there. I think when Jam and I marry we might truly experience "satisfaction" because neither one of us are "we must have the newest car, the biggest house" type people.

038. Mastered the cartwheel.

039. Skimmed the surface of water on waterskis. (odd considering the opportunities to do so!)

040. Seen Michelangelo's David.

041. Sung karaoke. Cathay Hanover, "It's Raining Men"

042. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt. More than once! It's great.

043. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.

044. Visited Africa. Twice, and I hope for more returns. It holds my heart.

Kili in Clouds and a Zebra

045. Walked on a beach by moonlight. YES. And saw blue phosphorescent algae in the sand!

046. Been transported in an ambulance.

047. Had my portrait painted.

048. Gone deep sea fishing.

049. Been to the Sistine Chapel in person.

050. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.

051. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling. Snorkeling in Ketchikan, Alaska. Amazing. Scuba scares me :P

052. Kissed in the rain.

053. Played in the mud. Kenya again.

054. Gone to a drive-in theater. (No but I found one in Mass and we must go!)

055. Been in a movie.

056. Visited the Great Wall of China.

057. Started a business. Landscaping, 97-02. Made good money. Gave it up to work for the Audubon Society.

058. Taken a martial arts class.

059. Visited Russia.

060. Served at a soup kitchen. Mainspring House, thanks to Jr. High Fellowship

061. Sold Girl Scout cookies. But of course.

062. Gone whale watching. Stellwagon Bank and Gulf of Maine.

063. Got flowers for no reason. Jamaal has sent them "just because."

064. Donated blood, platelets, or plasma. Blood, here and there, platelets every two weeks.

065. Gone sky diving.

066. Visited a Nazi concentration camp site.

067. Bounced a check. Oh yes. Actually, I overdrew my bank account 7 times in one day in January. Granted it was a processing thing at the bank....but still lol

068. Flown in a helicopter. MSP Helicopter N20SP. Crashed in the Charlers River two months later.

069. Saved a favorite childhood toy up until my late 20s. Um do you think I would ever give away teddy and purple doggie after they survived being left behind in Canada and made the 3,000 mile journey home in a shoe box. HELLS NO.

070. Visited the Lincoln Memorial. I would like to see it again though.

071. Eaten caviar. It's too salty, though I like to pretend I have refined taste and will eat it anyways.

072. Pieced a quilt. Yes indeed.

073. Stood in Times Square. It is daylight even at 2AM there!

074. Toured the Everglades.

075. Been fired from a job.

076. Seen the Changing of the Guard in London.

077. Broken a bone.

078. Been on a speeding motorcycle. Probably not "speeding" but it was fast enough for me!

079. Seen the Grand Canyon in person.

080. Published a book. I made two blurb books! I'm counting it!

081. Visited the Vatican.

082. Bought a brand new car. (my next forester will be new)

083. Walked in Jerusalem.

084. Had my picture in the newspaper. 1st grade, 3rd grade, college, for my job. I'm soo famous LOL.

085. Read the entire Bible.

086. Visited the White House. Got the super secret tour.

087. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. This is a weird 50% one. Participated in goat slaughter. I did not draw the knife across its throat, but did carve it up in the kitchen. It was gross. Goats taste like they smell.

088. Had chickenpox.

089. Saved someone's life.

090. Not known that 90 comes after 89, not 91. laaaame

091. Met someone famous. Minor celebs/sports figures. Good enough for me!

092. Joined a book club.

093. Lost a loved one.

094. Had a baby.

095. Seen the Alamo in person.

096. Swam in the Great Salt Lake.

097. Been involved in a law suit.

098. Owned a cell phone. A couple, actually.

099. Been stung by a bee. More than once. Ouch!

100. Ridden an elephant. I know I did at those seedy fairs and local zoos. Poor elephants!

I have a 52% completion rate on this one...which honestly is a bit of a relief given my 37% on the list from yesterday. Maybe I do better with long-term goals??

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Things I Didn't Get Done This Year

I find that I am funniest when I am filled with self-mockery and deprecation, especially when telling a story. People love stories where I make myself look like an ass - take my favorite story from Kenya, for example, the now infamous "Bunny Story." It almost always gets a laugh.

Lists are no exception to the mockery and deprecation. Sometimes I almost wonder if I make lists because I KNOW I will not complete them...thereby giving me a reason to make ANOTHER list. It's a vicious cycle - there's the "good" side of my brain that says "go! achieve! accomplish! be brilliant!" and then there's the wicked side of my brain that laughs and points and says "ahahahahah I sooo knew you wouldn't get that done."

Some may be upset by the lack of accomplishment, but I have decided not to worry too much about it. Because one makes a Bucket List in order to have a list of things to do before one dies....and this always leads me to think that with the completion of a Bucket List one does not find an overwhelming sense of self-satisfaction but DEATH.
Therefore in my lack of completion I have, for another year, cheated death!! VICTORY!

Seriously though, here's what I did and didn't do:

27 Things I Want to Do Before I'm 28:

1. Go somewhere new and somewhat faraway NO
2. Make a superfluous and ridiculous cake for no reason YES! I made not 1 but 2 bee cakes
3. Finish my running excel file bird life list (uber DORK!) there is plenty of time to be dorky!
4. Make a blurb photo book Yes - made two!
5. Run the Boston Marathon* No. Stress fracture, shin splints blah blah blah
6. Take more photos of everything, especially people Yes
7. Become insanely and enviously organized ha ha ha yeah right
8. Finish a long-abandoned craft project (under the sea cross stitch? sr year calligraphy project?)
I count the lizard ridge afghan because I bought most of the yarn for it years ago:
Lizard Ridge Afghan
9. FTDS and move in with Jamaal, opinions and judgements be damned No, but that's because the opportunity did not present itself. I will be doing this this year, and soonish. And actually there won't be judgments or opinions. I must've been very angsty when I wrote the original list!
10. Memorize a poem. Or two. "Bright Star, were I would as steadfast as thou art..not...alone..." um. No.
11. Set the bar higher at work- I'm not organized, I'm not putting in 100%, and that makes me sad - Kinda sorta.
12. GET OUT OF DEBT DAMMIT, ALLISON! ha ha ha no
13. Spend more quality time with Jamaal. We hardly have any down time or time to do fun things beyond go out to dinner. I want to do fun stuff for a change (not that food isn't fun, but you know). I want to do photo-worthy things. eh No
14. See a Red Sox game LIVE (bonus points for a stadium other than Fenway!) Nope. Damn.
15. Skip work, even if just for a day, to do something furtive and fun, like go to the beach. ooooh the indulgence! Uh, I took a personal day for a facial! Does that count?
16. Have the wedding planned out almost to completion so I enjoy the day Not precisely, but I'm doing OK
17. Take advantage of what Boston has to offer (restaurants, museums, shows etc) No. I suck.
18. Help more people and animals. I donate platelets and all, but it's kind of removed from the situation. Uh, ha ha ha I comforted a catbird while it died in my backyard...and I totally saved a woodpecker this Christmas. Oy.
19. Bird watch more - see five new species! (neeerrrddd alert) Yes. Super-Nerdy
20. Take better care of my skin (beyond sunscreen, I don't do much of anything) This is a yes. I just bought a Clarisonic too (dying to use it, Sephora is taking its sweetass time sending it!)
21. Chillax more. I am overbooked always, and feel guilty when I don't want to go to something, but have nothing to do otherwise. Have to stop feeling guilty too. Oh GOD no, I am not chillaxed. I have less guilt though.
22. Conquer a fear (this will be the hardest thing on the list!) Um. I don't think I really did this....unless you count "letting Jam pick a DJ" as one, lol
23. Reduce that knitting stash! No...BUT I did not add to it. Key.
24. Visit the Mapparium NO
25. Reconnect with someone YES
26. Spend more time in my kayak taking in the world. YES
27. Make a five-course dinner for me and Jamaal. I don't even know what those five courses would be really, but it's the kind of thing you hear in movies, and I'm gonna do it! YES! OMG and it was so good, even if the main course was spaghetti and heart-shaped meatballs!

I have a 37% completion rate here. Eck, that is bad! I am thinking of adding to this list and making one of those 100 things in 1000 days list, because I am self-centered and like thinking about all the stuff I want to do and goals and sh*t. Maybe that's what I'll do tomorrow to escape the mundane happenings at the office. Maybe....

Friday, April 23, 2010

For the Cat Lovers

Forgive me for my lack of fluency in lolcat speak ;)

Finepix 2009 045

"I'm sittin' on ur table, vanquishin' ur efforts"

Finepix 2009 024

"NO MORE CRAFTY TIME"

Finepix 2009 085

"I'm sleepin' on ur stuff, preventin' accomplishments"

I admit it - I miss the kittens.

Finepix 2009 073

Macaws say "Come closer so we can bite UR FACE!"

Friday, April 09, 2010

Spring Cleaning

Whew.

Just spent about three hours despamming my blog comments and deleting draft posts. I thought I was on my 600th post, but after deleting the drafts I realized I am about 25 posts short. Dang - I was hoping to hit 600 on my bday! Oh well...

In reviewing all the comments, I found some hilarious stuff. There were some really sweet anonymous or one-time commenters, especially on my mbta posts. There was one post I wrote that was called something like "I wish you would go away and f*cking die" Oh, the angst of my days with a particularly troublesome coworker, she really brought out the worst in me!! Ironically enough, I'm sitting in the office with one other coworker right now who is completely quiet - it's hard to believe that four years ago I was so incredibly miserable!

I also found interesting posts filled with lists of things I wanted to do, failures, accomplishments, crafts, lists of complaints...and videos, most notably of THE BRUISE:
http://risetovotesir.blogspot.com/2008/01/5632-post-about-my-bruise.html

Freaky.

Anyways, I do have to get back to work after wasting so much time on blog maintenance. First though, I will quickly wrap up petsitting.

The goats were NOT escaping because their manure pile was too high. Oh no. I can't believe I was dumb enough to think that was the cause. The goats succeeded in escaping three additional times before I figured out what I really needed to do. They were pouncing on their pen fence over and over until they either broke through it or trampled it to the ground and then pranced their merry way out. The final straw was coming "home" to find them in the FRONT YARD. Some random guy was scritching their heads and keeping them entertained...and by entertained I mean keeping them from running out into the street and getting nailed by a car or a fast-moving mail truck or hearse (there's a funeral home at the end of the street!). The guy introduced himself as the neighbor's grandson, adding to the introduction "You should really build a better fence." Um hi, I don't actually own this house, but yes, a better fence should be built." I actually came home early that day because I had to take my own pet birdie to the vet (he's fine) so I shut Penny and Copper in their goat house and took off for the vet, resolving to fix the fence when I returned.

The fence repair took a looong time. When I finally got back from the vet (after stopping at my house to get my bird's cage - I had to move him in with me because he needed twice-daily medication) and changed, gathered tools, etc, it was already late afternoon...I settled in for a long afternoon/evening of fence repair.

First the holes:
IMG_9959

It's hard to see here, but Penny and Copper basically destroyed about a 6 foot-wide section of fencing.

They used a team approach when smushing down the fence. Copper would weaken it:
IMG_9961

Then Penny would deliver the final blows:
IMG_9963

I knew I had to rewire the fencing sections that were completely destroyed, and reinforce the width of the fence with additional posts I found lying around the yard.
IMG_9965

The goats did not tax themselves whatsover, but rather sat back and watched:
IMG_9966

And of course, I cut my hand:
IMG_9969

Lulu the Grumpy Dog was my steadfast companion throughout the entire ordeal. She had decided to become my friend (probably after all the peace offerings of cheese and turkey pepperoni) and continued to sit by whatever area of the yard I was busy repairing. Once I finished the fence around the pen, I worked on reinforcing the fence around the yard. This was more of a quick and dirty fix, which involved wiring an old portion of the stockade fence to the wire fence; couldn't get the wire fence taut enough to keep it from bending every which way, and I knew that as long as the fence was bendable the goats could escape. The stockade fence, though a bit run down, would block the goats' exit from the yard.

Obviously, there was a lot of stress over the next few days whenever I had to leave and go to work. Would I return home to find the goats frolicking in the middle of the street?? Luckily, I turned out to be quite skilled in the field of temporary fence repair. Score.
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This meant I was able to turn my attention to the other creatures, like the 28 exotic birds in my care, Lulu the dog, and the two kitty cats.

Now there's a group of people out there that hate cats. I understand that some of them have had bad experiences or are allergic or whatever, but I think there might be some that don't really have any legit reason why. I totally respect irrational fears, I have a ton, but to just hate something for the sake of hating? STOPPIT. Because I learned during my two week stint that cats are awesome, hilarious, and easy. These two made my petsitting life fabulously entertaining (except the time they were playing in a paper feed bag at 3AM and making an ungodly racket):

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The cats were so low-key, however, they almost resulted in my ultimate petsitting FAIL. The homeowners were scheduled to come home on a Tuesday night. On Monday, I went crazy cleaning the house, and on Tuesday morning I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off emptying the trash, cleaning to toilets and tub, sweeping, etc. I packed the car and trundled off to the mbta lot, planning to stop by later that night to drop off the house keys.

When I drove up around 6:30pm, I could tell no one was home. I rang the bell and knocked and Lulu went NUTS. Finally, I used my key to get in. It was a little chilly in the house - had someone been home with the door open and left again? I called out - nothing. NO cats either, and the two of them usually came bounding from wherever the moment they heard the door open. It was eerie. As I went through the house I realized everything was exactly how I left it. I called to the cats. Nothing. I scratched Lulu's head, checked on the rest of the birds, and then locked up. Weird. I figured the homeowners would be home soon, so I tried not to worry...but I was stressed. They were supposed to arrive home around 1pm. Where were they? Where were the cats? What happened? Why was it cold in the house? Was it me, or was there a problem? What to do?

I sent out an email to our volunteer group. Someone replied "oh they're back in the US, safe and sound"

NOT HELPFUL. WHERE ARE THEY? AND WHEN WILL THEY BE HOME?

Finally, someone who had been on the trip emailed me back "we are running very late and won't be in til 12AM." Thank you, that is the kind of constructive information I wanted. I used this as my excuse to head back to the house. I was feeling very uneasy about the disappearance of the cats, wanted to put the goats in their pen and let Lulu out to pee, and make up the homeowner's bed (I had slept in it) because I had stripped in that morning and knew the last thing they'd want to do after 18 hours of traveling was find some sheets and make up the bed.

When I arrived at the house, the scene from earlier in the evening replayed itself. Lulu excited to see me, the birds chirping a greeting....and no cats. After doing some of the basic chores, I began a room by room search of the kitties, opening closets, checking every nook and cranny of the barn, searching the yard. Nothing. Finally to calm my own mind I told myself that they were probably hiding from me on purpose and as soon as the homeowners came back they'd be prancing around the house like always. My next step was to make the bed.

You see where I'm going with this, right?

I opened the bathroom linen closet.

And out sprang two cats.

Oh.My.God.

I used the linen closet to hang up my work clothes for the next day, otherwise they'd be covered with cat hair by the next morning. On Tuesday morning in my rush, I had left the linen closet door open while getting dressed, and then closed it during my last run-through of the house without checking inside. The cats must've gone in there while I was getting dressed or checking the house. That had been at 7AM. I checked the closet 13.5 hours later at 8:30PM. EPIC EPIC FAIL.

Naturally I felt awful, especially when the cats glared at me after leaping out of the closet. OMG. I felt like the worst person in the world. The only clutch things? The cats are so awesome that they didn't pee or poo in the linen closet and I discovered my mistake before the people came home. Thank GOD.

That was the crowning jewel of my petsitting experience, which ended up being "dampened" by the homeowners complaining about the fact that they lost their boiler while they were away. Apparently their basement, accessible only from outside of the house with a key they did not leave me, flooded on Monday night, and the boiler died. That's why the house was chilly and there was no hot water on Tuesday morning. The blame was publicly, though indirectly, placed on me via a group email. It kind of sucked. All in all, the experience was rewarding, and I was paid fairly well for it, but the complaints and accusations in the end left a bitter taste in my mouth. What can you do though really? Oh well. It couldn't have been THAT bad since I was asked to petsit again in October, but I was actually secretly glad that the wedding was my excuse to say "no."

In the end I also learned a lot. I never want to own any exotic birds besides the ones I have now. Cats are awesome. Goats are a handful. Dogs can be won over with cheese and pepperoni....oh, and basements flood.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

MBTA Bus Hits, Kills Bicyclist - Most Popular News Story - WCVB Boston

MBTA Bus Hits, Kills Bicyclist - Most Popular News Story - WCVB Boston

When I saw this headline I thought "It has to be the 39 bus"
Why?
Put it this way - I don't ride the 39 bus a TON, maybe once or twice a week from Brigham Circle to Copley.
Some of the drivers are nice. Most are not.
Most ARE good drivers.
A few are miserable. Yesterday I had to stand because there were no seats. I finally had to squish into a seat at the Prudential stop.
Why? The driver was one of those who would accelerate hard when the opportunity presented itself and then SLAM on the brakes. This happened about 10 times - 10 bad times, with my shoulder feeling like it was about to be dislocated as I swung from the pole. The way the guy was driving was TERRIBLE and felt dangerous.

In defense of the MBTA, I have encountered lovely bus drivers. One guy used to wake me up when I fell asleep on the CT3 so I would get off at Andrew Station. He knew I was working and in school and EXHAUSTED - we talked about it a lot in Melnea Cass traffic. Another lady I encountered used to try her hardest to be perfectly on schedule because one of her regular passengers had to transfer to another bus which literally would be pulling away as our bus would stop. I think overall the MBTA bus drivers are patient and skilled, absolutely. The ones on the 39 route, however, are nothing to write home about. And given the congestion at Huntington and South Huntington, the ridiculous mazework mishmash of trolley tracks intermingled with traffic and criss-crossing streets, and the fact that SOME of the bikers in the LMA area have no regard for the rules/laws of biking whatsoever, I'm not even that surprised someone got killed down there...it's sad though...sad like the family that let their dad/grandfather with Alzheimer's walk the streets alone, but that is a whole other story...

Friday, April 02, 2010

I am coming back soon....

...I promise. I even have more pet pics...

It's just that it's been raining here, a lot too. The sun is finally out though, and it's too bright and cheerful to be brooding in my office behind the computer.

I'm out :)